rachelbegins: (Default)
I think it's about time for a good meme.  More like, I feel like shit and doing a ridiculous meme might make me feel a little bit better.  Seriously guys, I've had a sore throat from hell and a really high fever for days now and I have no. idea. why. 

So, here it goes:

Set your MP3 player to shuffle and type out a lyric from each song that plays, 1-25.  Try and get your f-list to guess the songs.


1.  Letting you in, well, I'll be thinking 'bout tomorrow and every time we cross those lines.
2.  This glass house is burning down, you light the match, I'll stick around.  I'll give you everything you want and wish the worst on what I was.
3.  This might just be a waste of time, but there's no one I'd rather waste my time with than all my best friends.
4.  What you feel is what you are and what you are is beautiful. 
5.  I just got myself to blame, leave everything up to fate.  When there's choices I could make, when there's choices I could make.  And now my heart needs a polygraph, always so eager to pack my bags when I really want to stay.
6.  When you're soaring through the air, I'll be your solid ground.  Take every chance you dare.  I'll still be there when you come back down.
7.  I can't believe it's been a year since I kissed my fears on their salty lips and said to them, 'I love you all'. 
8.  I saw the clouds forming tornados in the sky, the winter winds blew on lake michigan that night.  I carved your name into my arm so I would remember you. 
9.  Somewhere in between the beginning and the end, september took the tourists, settled in for good.  We could hear the trains again, brooklyn girls in scarves.  Summer left, and no one said a word.  We'd open your window, stay in your bed all day, 'till the streetlights came on.
10.  But with all my expectations long abandoned, my solitary nature notwithstanding.  You're the one who pulled me out of that crash-landing, my stunning mystery companion.
11.   You are calm and reposed, watch your beauty unfold; pale white like the skin stretched over your bones.  Spring keeps you ever-close, you are second hand smoke.  You are so fragile and thin, standing trial for your sins.  Holding onto yourself the best you can, you are the smell before rain, you are the blood in my veins.
12.  An anchor tied to their feet, with all their love, their hearts will sink.
13.  Baby, is this love for real?
14.  As you bury yourself deep in the dust of the sandiest grave you can find, it's a new desert life.  To be reborn again out of glass and of sand and you're shimmering and you are clear.
15.  We're only taking turns holding this world.  It's how it's always been, when you're older you will understand.
16.  I dreamed I saw you walking up a hillside in the snow.  Casting shadows on the winter sky as you stood there, counting crows.
17.  I'd run to you, but pain awaits. I'm coming home, but I'll be late.
18.  Salt, sweat, sugar on the asphalt. Our hearts, littering the topsoil.
19.  The regrets are useless in my mind, she's in my head I must confess. 
20.  This story's old but it goes on and on until we disappear.  Call me and let me taste the salt you breathed while you were underneath, I am the one who haunts your dreams of mountains sunk below the sea.  I spoke the words, but never gave a thought to what they all could mean.  I know that this is what you want, a funeral keeps both of us apart.  You know that you are not alone, I need you like water in my lungs.
21.  You took me from all that I knew, showed me how it feels to hope.  With you with me, facing tomorrow, together I can learn to fly.  It feels like I'm living in the lions mouth, but the lion is an angel.
22.  Lonely the life and dismal the view.  Closed is the road that leads to you.  Since better can be as friends we'll agree, Sabra girl, time will cure me.
23.  Buses, trains and airplanes leaving, burning fumes of gasoline and everyone is running and I come to find a refuge in the easy silence that you make for me.  It's okay when there's nothing more to say to me.  In the peaceful quiet that you create for me, and the way you keep the world at bay for me. 
24.  The closer that I look is just the farther that you get.  Already, stubborn skin thickens in attempt to understand.
25.  Through playful lips made of yarn, that fragile capricorn unraveled words like moths upon old scarves.  I know the word's a broken bone, but melt your headaches, call it home.

And there's that.  Guess if you like.

Also, new layout that I think I'm probably in love with.  Life is good.
rachelbegins: (Default)
Sometimes, I'll wake up in the middle of the night and not know where I am.  I'll stretch and blink and reach for my glasses and in those first few moments of blurry consciousness, nothing feels like it should.  My eyes are too warm, my limbs are too light and it feels as if something has crawled under my skin.  And well, ever since I got this ridiculous cold, that's how I've been feeling.  I just.  I feel like I'm not all here. I fee like radio static.  Frazzled.  A little bit desperate and lost.

Let it also be known that I pretty much make less than sense when I'm on any kind of medicine, let alone taking one of every pill in the house, as I am now.  I will probably look at this entry tomorrow and want to punch myself.

On the bright side, my 18th birthday isn't until March 25th, but my mom bought my present  today:  2 tickets to see Fall Out Boy in Charlotte on April 24th.   And let me just say that I've never been more excited for anything.  Ever.  Fall Out Boy is my band, you know?  The one band that I've just always been into more than anyone else I know.  I'm a die hard, since Evening Out...  And honest to God, I could not have a more amazing mom.  The tickets and fees and parking totaled around 141 dollars and I don't even know if we can afford that.  But part of me doesn't even care because I'm not used to being about to do stuff like this and it almost feels like, after all the things I've gone without over the years, I deserve this.

She got two tickets, so I'm taking my bestie, Nic.  He even volunteered to drive =].  Obviously, we're excited as crap.

And this is gonna be my first real show.  I'll be 18 and going to my first show.  I think that fits, somehow.  It fits because going to big deal shows since the age of 12 doesn't make you hardcore, it makes you careless.  You don't appreciate concerts when you're 12.  When you're 12, you're a baby.  I'm excited because I'm old enough to really appreciate who I'm seeing, old enough to really enjoy myself. 

That reminds me of something I hate about a lot of Fall Out Boy fans, they're such snobs.  Seriously, if you haven't been to every show ever, they just turn up their noses and treat you like shit.  I know, I've been there.  They don't understand that forcing their parents to not go grocery shopping just so they can go to a show is not being a die-hard, it's being a snotty kid.  And we all know that happens.  Kids will cry and scream until they get their parents to hand over the credit cards.  My mom has never been able to afford concert tickets for me, so I've never bothered asking.  Because of that, I've missed 11 concerts in 7 years, at least.  Those are just the ones I can think of off the top of my head.  And it's never mattered because I've always known that it's more important to pay the bills. Growing up poor is good for a kid.

And because I've never seen FOB live,  no one on the message boards or Friends or Enemies will take me me seriously.  Very frustrating.  I guess that they just don't understand that there's a whole group of die-hards out there who simply don't have the means to see them as often as we would like, if at all.

Sorry about all the ranting, but I get really into the scene.  I think that everyone should just let the music speak for itself.  I wish that people would just stop being crazy. 

Still!  4 hours in a car with my best friend.  It's a good time already, pretty much.  And I made sure mom got GA floor seats so we can get up close to the stage and freak out and stuff. 

This brings me to my list of artists that I would love to see live, in no particular order:

1.  Jackson Browne.
2.  Panic at the Disco.
3.  Green Day.
4.  Gym Class Heroes.
5.  Counting Crows.
6.  Anna Nalick
7.  The Academy Is...
8.  The Eagles [just because]
9.  Trans-Siberian Orchestra.
10.  Jack's Mannequin.

It makes me really happy that FOB is no longer on the list because I'm actually gonna see them. 

I have to go back to school tomorrow and I don't want to because it's probably not safe to drive a mini-van while on cold medicine, and I have to turn in my annotated bibliography for my research paper on E.E. Cummings.  I haven't even started the actual paper, and my rough draft is due on Friday.

I haven't eaten in three days and now that I'm done ranting and not making any sense, I'm gonna go to sleep.

xo
rachel
rachelbegins: (Default)
It's been interesting.

School was out yesterday because it's 8 degrees outside.  Personally, I don't think it's that big of a deal because it's not like we'd be outside anyway, all the students would be inside the nice, warm classrooms.  But whatever, it gave me an excuse to not go to school so it's all good.

So, instead of going to school, I went out to eat with my older sister, Dani and our friend Aaron.  And then we got ice-cream XD.  I had this crazy rainbow death ice-cream with a bunch of sprinkles and it was awesome.  Then we came back to the house and watched House until roughly 10 that night when I had to go pick my Nic up from a basketball game.  He doesn't play, but he's in the pep band, so.

We brought Nic over here and he stayed the night to watch Star Wars with me XD.  We all fell asleep on couches and I woke up at like, 9 in the morning because Nic had scholar's bowl practice this morning.   I woke up and stumbled into my room to find real clothes and Nic was just chilling in my bed, watching a pokemon movie.   Which is pretty normal for us. 

So we woke up my sister and Aaron and Nic put on my Dahsboard Confessional shirt, the hat he bought me and my favorite MCR jacket =[.  Looks like I won't be getting those back for a while.  Anyway, we took him to practice, ran by the Wal-Mart for doughnuts, and now I'm haning out at the house until Dani and Aaron get home from guitar whatever.  It's been a good day.

I don't really understand where my crazy good mood came from.  I've just... I guess, I just randomly realized that I love my life.  Which is good, because my ex boyfriend fucked me up in the head.   He broke up with me three days before our six month anniversary and then started dating another girl the day after when our six month anniversary should have been.  In short, he was an asshole.  

Anyway.

I'm was listening to Northern Downpour earlier and my favorite thing to do is fix my headphones so that it only plays Brendon's voice.   There's just something about his voice... I think it's that he loves to sing so much that it just comes out in his voice and you can just feel it.  Besides, he's obviously had some kind of classical training.  I can just tell things like that, I grew up around singers.

You know what else is great?  Cranium.  You know, the board game?  It's pretty much the best thing since Disney Scene It?.  If you've never heard of it, you should totally get it, it's really amazing.

I'm rambling again.

June 2009

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